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【学长拉保险(虚实篇)】【作者:GPPX1720】

作者:GPPX1720
字数:3059


  yZWnxHpb.png.
  
点击看大图

学长拉保险(虚实篇)

今天来个小品吧,顺便分享一下近况,上篇文断尾断得快,毕竟打完文章都
晚上三四点,我精神不继了~ 「~

现在女友大人(或者老婆大人,但是我还是称女友大人好了,女友两个字比
较有感觉我觉得,老婆多了更多道德压力)

跟阿正的互动呢,没有之前那么狂热,大概是小A出轨事件,让两人各自内
心愧疚感爆棚,所以现在变成偶尔心血来潮才会互尬一下(比如说某天啊正要出
门约会,突然被女友大人叫住,硬是被吹了一发才放行……帮姊妹清一下她男友
的旧库存……真是体贴)而且两人怕失了节制,所以说好要以价制量……

BJ一次1000$$口爆 500;

全套一次2000$$中出1000$$……

如果是女友诱惑,男生一样钱照给这价格是我定的,应该是比行情便宜@@
(我没喝过所以不太清楚,只知道大概)便宜就当友情价吧

消费制一实施,就变成妹有情郎无意了,毕竟小A挺会花钱的,即使阿正是
在天龙有房的幸运儿,也感受到一点压力上个月女友大人大概替我们赚了600
0生活费(变成风俗娘了……)再多一点感觉阿正会被榨乾(皮包跟囊包……)

女友大人从业一个月不到的心得是觉得:超好赚!既可以爱爱又可以赚钱,
难怪这么多女生下海去……(我OS:小姐,你这应该还低於行情呢……)

补个西斯点:阿正似乎跟女友相干久了越来越不客气,因为不是自
己女友所以不用怜香惜玉?他整个热爱干女友的嘴,完全没再客气那种,压了头
就是一直往嘴捅,而女友大人则是土下坐姿双手放膝盖,任由阿正的肉棒肆虐自
己的嘴,我有时看了是挺心疼的,尤其女友被口水噎到狂咳的时候。

一直以为女友大人不太喜欢(有次试完被她骂说不被尊重),但有次阿正一
回到家,她就立刻跳到阿正面前就位,土下座等棒棒干嘴,看得我都糊涂了……

------------------------------------------------------------------

好啦,小品文来了,来分享一下最近女友跟旧顾重新连络上的小事件(但本
身没什么,就当作生活记事?)对话内容有作修改,方便大家尻尻,至於线% 了,猜一下哪些是真的吧ㄎㄎ

大家应该还记得,大学时期女友大人被他们系上的学长追吧?就是那个有钱
有势的学长(还有点帅,假借活动场勘之名要在外县市外宿,想设局跟女友大人
过夜的那个,后来女友大人极力争取当日来回,不然主办协办都是学长的人,女
友80% 会被车下去)

这个学长小废物呢,不知道是家道中落还是怎样,一阵子没消息,竟然跑去
当保险业务,近期到处跪求拉保,这几天也拉到女友这边来。一开始当然是脸书
私讯:哈啰~学妹,好久不见了……

由於这位是比较敏感的人物,女友第一时间就跟我讲被私讯,就以前清纯可
爱的女友大人,我会担心她被拐走,但现在我完全不担心,只给了命令:陪他玩
玩。女友高兴地领命。

(其实女友高兴是可想而知,毕竟牡羊麻~ 哈不哈是挺明显的,当时就颇有
迹象,更不用说现在的女友大人留口水都不擦的)

过一两天我才收割了他们的对话内容,内容一开始就是一些嘘寒问暖,更新
一下对方近况,对话中这猪哥学长会偷塞一些讚美女友的话(什么这么久没见还
是这么漂亮,身材很好之类的啥鬼)女友也是每句都接,回一些:你也还是很帅
啦~比以前更「壮」的称钻,看学长反应爽的,都忘记自己是要拉保险的了,很
快就露出马脚,开始想邀约女友见面,女友大人当然不是省油的灯,她下一句就
问:学长你现在有女朋友吗?学长十分钟后回:没有

女友大人:那学长明天要来家里吗?(爱心)又过了7分钟学长:痾
……方便吗?(干,口水都要流出来了还装)

女友大人:不过我男友在哦~ 学长:痾……是喔你男友……

女友大人:他在不方便吗?还是说我支开他?

学长:(思考的贴图)

女友大人:可是他不在我怕学长会想色色的事情(我:鼻血一喷)

学长:!!!!!!……你这么正……很难不想吧……

女友大人:(害羞贴图)也是,那还是别支开他好了学长:蛤……

女友大人:蛤什么?

学长:蛤~ 还是支开他好了女友大人:为什么?(装傻问号贴图)

学长:方便我跟你介绍很好的一款……保……险……

女友大人:……套?

学长:……久不见,你变的很不一样……

女友大人:什么不一样?

学长:……很敢女友大人:不喜欢吗?还是你喜欢以前我清纯的样子~ (爱
心)

学长:……都喜欢女友大人:我现在绝对让你爱不释手,尝过一次回味无穷
学长:就像你的吻吗?

……三小!这句话「就像你的吻吗?」意思是……!!?

女友大人:……那是你强吻……而且就当作慰劳你辛苦带营队才没讲出去…



学长:是哦真是谢谢你女友大人:好啦正经正经,在提以前的事情我要生气
了,所以你刚刚说是保险什么啦学长:套女友大人:还闹!好啊,保险套好用,
然后呢?

学长:然后……问你要不要试试看女友大人:可是我们都没再用套套的耶~

(爱心)

学长:真假……不怕出事吗?

女友大人:可是很舒服阿~

学长:干有你这种女友也太爽了吧!!

女友大人:谢谢~ 他是常常被我弄得不要不要的,SO~ SORRY我们没
办法试你推荐的东东学长:……还是你想……跟我试一下?

过了五分钟……

女友大人:我没有说你要戴阿……

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

看完讯息,我抓了女友来拷问,问那个吻,她才说了一点,我才想起来她早
就告诉过我了……学长告白那天发生的事情,女友因为那件事情写了一封「悔过
书」给我……字很漂亮我必须说,洋洋洒洒一千字。

不过我还是调侃女友人真好,给学长慰劳之吻

女友大人看我不生气,笑着说:「小时候我不懂事,不懂带营队超级辛苦,
如果当时是现在的我,肯定会帮学长吹一整晚,直到他不要不要的~」